Wednesday, January 30, 2008

AI- Omaha Auditions

psst- Show. C'mere a minute. Yeah, you, over there. I wanna tellya something. See, Nebraska... Nebraska is a state. And it's in the middle of the country, an area that coasties dismiss automatically as uninteresting and unimportant, and farmish. And yes, Nebraska is farmish. But Omaha... Now Omaha is a city. A city with a population of nearly one million people. Yep, that's right- almost one million. I've been to Omaha, there is not a cornshock to be found within the city limits unless it's part of a store decoration. And even then, I doubt it. Not that I ever depended on the Fox Channel for geographical information, but sheesh.

On the other hand, without AI, I would never have known that Nebraska had such a concentrated population of Werewolves, Vampires, legging-wearing ex-wrestlers, and strange horned Ren Faire rejects. None of whom can sing (though that's not such a surprise).

Simon was particularly kind to the deer-in-the-headlights-lyric-forgetter, but I doubt he'll get much further than the Hollywood rounds. Gigantic Arm Wrestling lady had a perfectly serviceable Country Singer Yodel that she was told to weed from her repertoire. Poor Angelica Puente thinks going on American Idol will repair her damaged relationship with her father (I liked her voice though, and wish her well). Samantha Sidley was my favorite of the night, though there are rumors swirling already about her being a ringer (along with Australian Michael Johns, Irish Carly Smithson, paralyzed vocal cord boy David Archuletta, and more- people with former major music industry connections and contracts that went strangely unmentioned during their auditions). (For the record, former contracts have always been okay in the AI universe, as long as the contestant doesn't have a current relationship with a company. But not mentioning that so many- and I've heard at least 10 of the Hollywoodites, all people who we've seen, which gives them a leg up on the unseen ones who passed muster- have had fairly extensive experience in the pro-music world, is a little disingenuous).

On the bright side, Omaha saw the return of Loopy Paula- crawling up on the table like a dog, hiccupping loudly, having *plane delays*. Soon she'll be describing the contestants' butterfly auras and weeping openly into her *coke*. Welcome back, Pauler.

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