AI- Phoenix Auditions

We open with Simon looking much younger, and a little softer, from which we segue into a rather nice montage of memorable former contestants. Hey, it’s Like a Virgin Keith. And there’s Clay, before and after. And Paula and Simon kissing (urk), and the Ryan/Ruben/Ruben’s Brother sandwich, and Kellie Pickler and Daughtry and McPhee and surprise surprise, no Taylor. Sanjaya, Sanjaya’s crying girl, William Hung, Mikalah Gordon, Fantasia, oh, Elliott’s sweet mom, whoa… Taylor!, Kelly, Carrie, David Cook and Jordin (my surprise is justified- just because they’re showing all of the winners, doesn’t mean that Taylor’s existence will be acknowledged). We finish with the new opening, Ryan barely enduring a smooch from some undressed chick, the hysterical Archuletta tween girls from U-Tube, and finally, some doofus in a pink bunny suit.

This. is. American. Idol.

So we’re in Phoenix, and guess what- Phoenix is hot in August. Who knew? And here’s a peek at the new judge, Kara DioGuardi,with whom I am not at all familiar. She looks… well she looks like a person I know nothing about.

Day 1 Auditions:

Twan with the floppy afro, is every bit as bad as you’d expect him to be, and they let him go on a looooong time, playing him out to Careless Whisper (which always morphs into Hairless Sister in my mind).

Emily Hughes is pierced and tattooed and ear-bobbed, and is obviously, this year’s pink haired rocker. She’s okay, but no Wilson Sister.

Weepy, wimpy wannabe rocker Randy looks 40. Randy cries real tears and I laugh.

J.B LastnameflashedbybeforeIcouldwriteitdown – I say no no no, the judges say yes, yes, yes, yes. He can’t hold a note and thinks that being on AI will somehow help his family.

There are no words for Michael Gurr, except that he may just have replaced Virgin Keith as the worst audition ever.

I am honestly unsure if Will Kunick, with the Mohawk and false eyelashes, was male or female. I am, however, perfectly sure that s/he can’t sing.

Aundre, aka X-Ray, dances like a boneless seal, and sings like Paula claps.

So, 47 minutes into the show, and we finally hear someone whose voice pleases me- young and very pretty (which, for better or worse, counts on this show) Adrianna does a passable Corinne Bailey Rae. She’s a shoe-in.

Day 2

Ah- it’s Bowser from Sha Na Na. Why am I singing, “Let my pipple goooooooo”?

16 year old Leah Marie Something, seriously needs to look into calming down. She declares that her style is a mix of Hillary Duff and Madonna. She’ll be back next year, mark my words, at which time she’ll sound like an unholy combo of Hannah Montana and Phoebe Snow.

Stevie Wright has a wobbly moment or two, but her At Last is good. I have hopes for her.

Michael Sarver says he works at the world’s most dangerous profession, which I think means he crews on the Cornelia Marie. Turns out he’s an oil rig guy (okay, that’s every bit as risky as crab fishing). I’m withholding my opinion on his voice until I can hear more of it. He has potential, and looks like a genuinely nice guy.

Bikini girl is predictable and boring, so I’m not going to write about her.

Ditto the male version, Sexual Chocolate (or Chacolate, according to his tattoo).

Brianna Quijada won’t last two days in Hollywood, but we’ll all be calling Simon, Simey from now on.

Deanna Brown, this year’s Kellie Pickler, did okay with Dock of the Bay.

And Cody Sheldon, the current Sanjaya, with the Jason Castro eyes, was okay, but I suspect he’ll fall apart in Hollywood. I can’t wait to see the horror movie he’ll make from this experience.

Geeky Alex, with the very awkward sense of humor, is interesting. The last contestant Simon hated this much, won the whole shebang (my beloved Taylor Hicks). We’ll see how far he goes.

So, why didn’t the large gal with the flower from the Dead or Alive montage, make it through? She obviously has pipes.

And we close with Scott McIntyre, who is blind (this will be the last time I mention that fact, unless it has a direct bearing on the narrative- as with Ryan trying to high-five him. sigh). I think I could love this kid.

As always, we only saw a fraction of the kids who made it through. Most of the invisibles have already, for whatever reason, been consigned as elimination fodder, though one or two unknowns sneak into the Top every year (Bo Bice, Jessica Sierra, Jason Castro), so it’s not wise to discount them all. Paula was uncommonly lucid. Simon was fairly gentle. Randy was Randy. Kara was fine.

All in all, a good opener. Tomorrow night- Kansas City.

... today the minutes seem like hours, the hours go so slowly...

... tonight, tonight....

A normal person would be deeply embarrassed to be so very excited about the season premiere of our nation's cheesiest screamfest. But I'm not normal, and I have no shame. From the first episode (which we watched only because nothing else was on that night), I was hooked. And hooked, I remain. And hopeful that this season, I'll find another The One.

Season 1 was enjoyable, though I didn't love any of the kids in particular, beyond being amazed at Kelly's talent (and I'm too old to actually enjoy any of her subsequent work). My first The One was Clay Aiken, with whom I was enchanted from the first notes of his audition (though I have never, ever called myself a Claymate. So I guess I do have a shred of dignity left). And in fact, Season 2 had the trifecta of talent for me, as I was almost equally enthralled with Ruben and Kimberley Locke too (and to a lesser extent, Frenchie Davis, though she has since annoyed the bejabbers out of me). Season 3 was a near-total bust, coming off that Aiken High, I guess. I had a soft spot for LaToya London and George Huff. I liked Jennifer Hudson, but thought she was a bit shouty. (she has since shown me what's what). Season 4 was better, though my favorite that year, Scott Savol (yeah, I know- but he could sing), did about as well as I expected him to. Season 5's Taylor Hicks was another One for me- again hooking me from his audition. I dialed my idiot fingers off for him every week. I was beyond thrilled that he won, and despite his less than stellar sales (none of the winners can compete with Carrie Underwood anyway, not even Kelly), I think he got what he wanted and needed from the show: the ability to earn a living as a working musician. Having seen him in concert, I can say that he puts on a fantastic show. Season 6 was blah- unlike much of the country, I saw no talent in Blake Lewis or Chris Richardson, and the show's relentless favoring of Jordin Sparks dissipated most of my good feeling for her, especially given the superior talent of Melinda Doolittle (and LaKisha Jones, who was spotty in performance but amazing when she was on) (and if there is any doubt as to Melinda's ability to sell a song- give this a listen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=afZLS6ZhPtQ ). It took me most of last season to warm to David Cook, but he's doing pretty well. Young Master Archuletta may grow up to be an artist, given a chance to stretch his wings. My own fave, Jason Castro, will likely spend his future in a good natured haze of smoke.

So this year is a blank slate- how long before Paula unravels? How nasty will Simon be? Will he and Ryan continue their super secret romance? How many seconds into the show will it be before Randy says *dawg*? And the singers- I cringe for the bad ones, and cheer for the good. And always, I watch for The One. It's been 2 seasons-well past time for me to go totally bonkers over a reality show contestant again. For those who are new to the blog, here's what's going to happen between now and May: I'll still talk about knitting, and books, and music, and whatever else occurs to me. And I'll post paper dolls on Thursdays (until I run out, which may happen fairly soon), and I'll post Freebie Friday patterns when I have them to post. But Tuesday and Wednesday nights will be owned by American Idol, from the beginning to the bitter (or triumphant) end. You have been forwarned…

oh the weather outside...

… is….. interesting.

We got some new, light snow last night, and some old, heavy wind this morning- a combo that makes me extremely glad I'm staying home today. Later this week, we're supposed to have temps close to –30 without the wind. With the wind this morning (gusts predicted over 50mph), temps are close to that. It's nasty, lemee tellya.

The new Zune and I are getting along pretty well- the sound quality is excellent, and the storage capacity exceeds anything I'll need in my lifetime (since I have no desire to watch movies on a 3" screen), but the scroll feature is a little hard to master. I end up playing podcast episodes when I think I'm just thumbing through the catalog (and therefore missed Mr Bennet's return to Longbourn from London, after searching for Lydia and Wickham, and I can't figure out how to rewind without listening to the entire chapter- not that I can't quote most of the book back to the recording anyway, but as long as I'm listening, I'd actually like to hear the story). Otherwise, I am delighted to have a functioning portable music device again.

I am making progress on the Twisted Leftover Mitered Square Socks, and am so seriously enchanted with this combo of colors and shades that I am contemplating collecting several full skeins of each of these colorways (a project that could take months, if not years, since Meg dyes colors as the spirit moves her, and buying them is a matter of being at your computer for the single hour they're available before someone else snatches them up)(besides which, I could not afford an entire sweater-worth of yarn in a single order anyway) to make a mitered square cardigan. Wouldn't it be beautiful? And worth the wait just for the yarn… not to mention how freaking long it would take to knit a whole sweater comprised of 19-stitch mitered-squares, on 2.75mm needles.

My desk calendar is the 2009 Card Calendar, from which you can make over 100 cards during the year. I chose this one because I play with rubber stamps on occasion, and it looked fun and practical, since I try to write a letter to each of my 3 grandkids every week. The large sheets cover 3 days, and each one has punch-outs and foo-fooraw for 1 or more cards. Some of them are pop-up cards, others are tags and giftie tie-ons, and some are just the pieces that you attach to cardstock. No envelopes are included, and you have to add your own little flourishes (which is part of the fun) but they do have a stencil for making little envelopes for the gift cards. Most of the cards are small, but can be sent through the mail. If you check the calendar sales right about now, you might find one for a couple of bucks, just to play with. These cards are January's output so far.

And Betty has posted pics of our Friday Knitters Etc. meeting on her blog. Check out the Special Olympics scarves. Betty's Loft blog is in the links to the right of the page.

Note to The Golden Globes Producers: aisles. Look into it.

Note to Salma Hayek: Boobs! Yikes!

Taylor Tailor

So, sew... (someone, stop me).

Anyway, I had a lovely time sewing doll clothes this weekend. Patterns for 18" dolls are smaller, but otherwise exactly the same as for full-size human clothes. It took me a little while to get back into the rhythm of sew, clip, trim, and turn, but it came back. My granddaugter loved watching the 0utfits come together, and was totally enchanted with the jammies and hooded bathrobe. Okay, I'll be honest- I was enchanted too. These outfits are beyond cute, and the details are pretty amazing (fully lined coat, hooded bathrobe, ruffled jammies, fold up cuffs on the jacket, an actual fly-placket on the skirt). And the clothes all fit her doll perfectly.

I bought more fabric (and ordered a couple of books, including a set of knitting patterns for 18" dolls) so I'll be sewing more (we have birthdays coming up in March and April), but not next week- next week I MUST work on my book proposal. Not only do I have to work on it, I have to finish it. So don't be surprised if I am quieter than usual. Oh wait, American Idol starts on Tuesday (!)- I'll be yakkier than ever. Nevermind (ah, there's my Gilda Radner joke).

There is no hope for me

Remember a couple of days ago, when I wrote a huge big long enormous post that disappeared when I tried to publish it? I whined? And it was gently suggested that I write the actual post somewhere else, and then copy/paste it into place? And so I did that for a couple of days? And then this morning, I forgot? And so this morning's post disappeared into the ether too?

Yeah, me too.

So, second verse, not quite the same as the first, but I'm typing it in WORD, so it won't be lost. Sheesh.

Anyway, yesterday the roads were a mess- glare ice and freezing rain (to the point where my husband had to stop the pickup and scrape the windshield twice in a 40 minute drive). I would never have attempted the trip on my own, but aforementioned Hubby had some errands in the Big City (Aberdeen, SD, with a population of about 30k, the 3rd largest city in the state) and he offered to drive. Our monthly knitting group was wonderful, as always. Several other knitters produced blue and white scarves for the Special Olympics (Betty Clay took pics, and will probably post them to her blog. Is there a link for that blog to the right of this? If not, I'd better add it)(note to self: stop asking yourself questions that you can't answer from WORD). The opinion on Red Heart Super Saver yarn was unanimous…

I began work on another pair of mitered-square socks (pattern and instructions somewhere on the blog. Search thee, and ye shall find). I'm using leftover Twisted Fiber Arts Kabam (wool/bamboo) yarn in the Agnes, Giles, and Minstrel colorways. I think these will be the most beautiful socks in the history of socks. Or at least in my history of socks.

And while we were in town, we picked up a new Zune. The old one would probably have survived the system-wide glitch if we hadn't decided to take it apart and poke around in the innards (I know- what the hell were we thinking? Mostly that it was out of warrantee anyway, so it didn't matter- not realizing soon enough that it wasn't a hardware problem). So I now have a 120gb Zune (as opposed to the 30gb zune, which was only about half filled with my entire collection of music- some 5,000 songs), and I was able to pick up with Lizzy and Darcy and the infamous Wickham on the treadmill this morning. Now The Hub can fiddle with the old one all he likes- who knows, maybe he'll get it working again. He is pretty handy that way.

I used to sew all the time, but I haven't done any more than absolutely necessary to keep our clothes from falling off in the last couple of decades. But 3 Granddaughters (one actual, 2 honorary) got American Girl-Type dolls for Christmas (not the real thing, which are far too expensive and nowhere near as cool as they were before Mattel bought the company out). I found a couple of patterns on eBay, and I think I'll expand their wardrobes a bit this weekend.

Monday, it's back to work on a book proposal that is overdue (as in, it should have been done before Christmas. It wasn't). Wish me luck.

Oh yeah- and I had no problem distributing 15lbs of free yarn at knitting yesterday. I didn't think I would.

Weather, Stash Busting, Wine

Today is the monthly meeting of my knitting group, Knitters Etc (to whom, by the way, The Big Book of Socks is dedicated), but Mother Nature doesn't like my knitting group. For the third month in a row, the weather is more than iffy on meeting day. This morning, there's a shiny new ice coating on all of the vehicles, windy snow is predicted, and Aberdeen is 43 miles away. I don't want to stay home, but I don't want to spend the afternoon in a ditch either. If I go, I am going to do something that I have been meaning to do for over a year: give some yarn away. A basement re-arrangement uncovered cones of yarn that I bought and then forgot, over 5 years ago. I didn't use the yarn for various reasons (the wool is good for felting but too scratchy otherwise, the smaller cones are acrylic, purchased online in one of those Get 10lbs of Yarn for Almost Nothing- We'll Choose For You sales that I have since outgrown.) It is well past time to face the obvious truth: I'm not going to use any of it. But like every knitter in the world when faced with a destash, I looked at each cone and said, "hmmm... I could use that for...." But I'm not gonna do it- this stuff is outta here. If no one at Knitters wants it, I'll leave it at the Salvation Army (what are the chances out of 20 knitters, that no one will 15 lbs of free yarn?)

And I finished the Aunt Helen Variation Variation socks- they turned out beautifully.

The Blackberry Melomel went into the carboy yesterday, for secondary fermentation. Mead ferments more slowly than sugar-based wines, so this will probably bubble away for 2-4 weeks before reaching the proper specific gravity. The riesling is looking good (it has been moved to the cool basement, and then cloaked in a towel, to keep it in the dark). It is nicely transparent now, and could be bottled in another month (actually it could be bottled now, but we'll wait). It's hard to tell if the Merlot is clear yet- dark red wines are dark (big surprise there), but it's looking good. We'll probably wait another month, and then bottle both of them.

If I stay home, I have book work to do- I'm in the process of checking finished charts line by line (square by square) with my originals. It's just about as much fun as it sounds. I hope I can hit the road.

Thursday Tab- Gilda Radner, Avon

This one was sold in book stores, during the heyday of Saturday Night Live (which only perked up again with Tina Fey). It has a lot of pages, so I'm going to post half this week, and the rest next week.

I'd do an Emily Litella joke here, but I'm drawing a blank. Next week, I'll be prepared.