Wednesday, April 18, 2012

AI Season 11 Top 6 (no wait, it's still 7) Performance- 04-18-12

Why is this show still 2 hours long? I'm tired and I want to go to bed.

I forgot that no one went home last week, but the show sure remembers. We get the whole drama again, Silent Movie Style.

JLo is wearing a dress that can best be described as a skin-tight armadillo suit with ab-windows. Her hair is pulled up and back in barrettes. Randy is in a lavender blazer with a peace sign patch, and a huge white watch. Steven looks like a fabric store threw up on him. Ryan is in a dark blue suit. He takes time to acknowledge the passing of Dick Clark.

Tonight the kids will each sing 2 songs, the first chosen from songs released between 2000-now, and the second will be Soul. Good luck with that one, kiddos.

#1 Hollie is going to sing Rolling in the Deep, and I think I have formally reached Adele Overload.
Iovine advises Hollie to sing and not think. I would have advised her to choose pretty much any other song. Onstage, Hollie has great hair, a sparkly blue top, an icicle necklace, and long loose layered transparent pants over capris. Seriously. Anyway, I would have bet against Hollie being able to do this song justice, but she's proving me wrong. The judges are happy, though Randy heard non-existent pitch problems.

#2 Colton is singing Lady Gaga (I reached Lady Gaga Overload long ago). Onstage, Colton is in red leather pants, a lacy transparent black droopy shirt, and a black and silver coat that is short in front and has shredded tails in back. And he has a bright red streak in his hair. This may be his most ridiculous outfit yet, and that's saying something. This is that Ga-Ga-ooh-la-la song and it's terrible (not just the song, but this particular performance). There's lots of squatting and shouting and smoke and backup people all dressed in white. The judges love it. sigh.

#3. Elise is singing Alicia Keys' No One. Iovine thinks that Elise feels like and underdog, and that she is judged week-to-week on the individual performances, with not much fan support. Elise is wearing an orange, one-shouldered dress with a transparent, floaty, gathered, long overdress. The elements are terrible, but the dress doesn't look that bad on her. Her song is not particularly melodic, but she's doing well with it. JLO gets GOOSIES! Steven was not thrilled with the song choice. Randy compliments Elise's restraint.

#4. Phil is singing Usher's You Got it Bad. Iovine has wisely decided to stop pushing Phil to be anything but what Phil is. Onstage, Phil is wearing a gray tee. He starts out on a stool, with his guitar (doing a pretty intricate strum). There are also bongos and a sax onstage. I don't' know this song, but I like it. Phil gets a Standing O from the judges.

#5. Jessica is singing Alicia Keys' Falling. Iovine says that Jessica has to save herself. Onstage, she has big big earrings, wavy hair, and a white belted thing that I think is a dress at first, but when she moves, I see that it's actually a flowing jumpsuit. This girl wants to win, and she sounds fantastic. The audience gives her a Standing O, though the judges stay seated. They assure Jessica that they loved it though.

#6. Skylar is singing Lady Gaga's Born This Way (damn, I'm doing a lot of sighing tonight). Iovine gives her good, specific advice. Onstage, Skylar is wearing egg whisks for earrings, black latex leggings, a white shirt that gathers right over the hips, a long floaty open shirt (and by long, I mean knee length), topped by a sparkly silver vest. The whole thing is cinched tight with a wide belt. If Hifiger is responsible for the sartorial sinning tonight, he needs to be fired. I imagine that Skylar did fine with this song, but it didn't do anything for me. JLo gushes, Steven's glad Skylar was born that way, Randy says she has crossover appeal.

#7. Oh for crying out loud, Joshua is singing Fantasia's I Believe. Iovine says that being in the Bottom 3 has given Joshua the deer-in-the-headlights look. Onstage, he's wearing a red blazer over a black shirt with white pin dots. Fantasia herself goes batshit on this song, and I fully expect Joshua to do the same. He holds back, which is good, but I still don't like him or this song, which is pure schmaltz. He gets a Standing Judge O.

Everyone's second songs will come from the Soul Train years. This should be interesting, if by *interesting*, I mean *train-wrecky*.

#1-2 Hollie gets a greeting from the Liverpool Football (soccer) Club. She's wearing a short, tight pink dress with cap sleeves. She's singing Son of a Preacher Man, entering at the top of the stairs, and then very gingerly makes her way down. Advice: if you can't sing and walk down stairs at the same time, start out on the flat ground. There are definitely some bad notes in this, but worse yet, there is absolutely no soul. However, the judges love it.

#2-2 Colton is singing Earth Wind and Fire's September. He's wearing black with a gray scarf, and is seated at a red baby grand piano. Yikes- this is terrible, all emo and angst and whine. The Hub, who is quite conversant with 70's music, didn't recognize the song at all. It's been Colton-ized into a mish-mosh of wailing. Steven didn't like the song choice. JLo was not thrilled either. Neither was Randy. Maybe Colton will finally be in the bottom 3.

#3-2 Elise is singing Let's Get it On. She's wearing floaty black high-waisted pants and a black strapless top, with a black shrug. I like Elise a lot, but this is pretty underwhelming. She starts all slow and sultry on a white couch, but then she gets up and shouts and growls and squats a lot. I didn't like the finish at all. JLo wants more emotion, Steven though it was sexy but  needs more, Randy thinks the song was wrong for her voice.

#4-2 Phil is singing Wilson Pickett's Midnight Hour. He's without guitar, in a black jacket. This song is absolutely perfect for him, and he delivered yet another Phil-Phil performance that has the judges gushing.

#5-2 Jessica is singing Try a Little Tenderness. She's wearing a black leather jacket over a black top with weird white fringes at the neckline, and purple jodphurs. No, I am not making this up. Oh dear, this is really terrible. Yikes! It's shouty, and sharp, and completely unpleasant. I have come to the conclusion that the judges are deaf, because they love it.

#6-2 Skylar is singing Heard it Through the Grapevine. She's wearing a hot pink short dress with an even hem! The bodice has a very (very) deep plunge, and it looks like it's constructed out of black and silver metal. She's singing Aretha's version of the song, and it's everything that Jessica's performance was not. The judges are enthusiastic.

#7-2 Joshua is singing Sam Cooke's A Change is Gonna Come, which I need to mention was my fave Taylor Hicks' audition song, so I'm not apt to like Joshua's version of it, even if I do like it. Which I do not. Joshua is wearing a black, scoop-neck leather vest over a black shirt with either a very drapey collar, or a weirdly tucked scarf. His runaway vibrato is front and center, and he cranks it up to 25 or so by the end. He gets a Standing O from the judges and a shake of the head from me.

Tonight's Worst:
Jessica #2
Colton #1
Colton #2

Dishonorable Mention: Joshua #2

Tonight's Best"
Hollie #1
Phil #1
Phil #2

Honorable Mention Jessica #1

Someone is going home tomorrow night. Probably Elise.

1 comment:

Perfect Trim Ruler said...

I could hardly wait to get here to see your description of JLo's outfit! I also loved Hollie's first performance and Phil of Course! I hope Colton goes home. He was terrible! I think Elise needs to stand up straighter. You're probably right about her going tonight though. They sure seem to have a lot of shouting singers this year. I wonder if they're having a little backstage competition going - who can sing the loudest notes!